Friday, August 01, 2008

The X-Files: I Want to Believe

In brief, it kinda sucked.

In fact, taken as a movie, it blew.

Taken as a two part episode of the TV series, however, it was okay.

Considering the series ended with Mulder and Scully on the run and the movie shows them...doing things that don't involve running...I can't help but watch the movie thinking that everyone showed up just to get paid. Chris Carter directed and wrote it with Frank Spotnitz, but personally, with the budget they had, I can't help but feel they were embezzling. Seriously, the movie did not feel like $30 million dollars, unless inflation is so bad that $30 million can't even get you half a step above TV show quality.

The story between Mulder and Scully felt dead on arrival in many places. They looked like they were just chewing scenery more and acting less. I'm not expecting Oscar caliber, but it's not asking much to at least put in some effort.

The stuff with Amanda Peet and Billy Connely was cool, they really should have stuck with that. Peet's character comes across as a Mulder-lite, sort of X-Files: The Next Generation. But she dies just when you're starting to really dig her. Billy Connely plays a psychic pedophile priest. Man, I've never been more grateful for a pedophile priest, because he pretty much saves the movie. Him and the fact that Gillian Anderson is even hotter then ever. Man, seriously, she needs to get her tits out.

Oh, and Xzibit? I guess that's where the $30 million dollars went, right up his nose. I don't know why they felt the need to craft a one note character that serves no purpose and leaves midway through as less then an afterthough because...they were expecting Xzibit's dozens upon dozens of fans to flood the theaters and make them big money? Jesus jumpin Christ, what a complete waste of time and money.

The movie ends on a relatively and deliberately ambiguous note. Mulder puts it to Scully that they can run away again or never give up and when presented with a difficult decision to make regarding a medical patient of hers (a running subplot throuh the movie) Scully never gives up. I think the creative team has. No one gave a shit making this movie. This was a cynical way to cash in on a franchise while putting the final nail in its coffin. The fans, if they even know the movie is out, will be sorely disappointed with the final product presented to them. A one course meal thrown together on the fly, spit upon and served on a cracked platter before being slapped across the face and spited.

I took my mom to see it tonight. I was never a big fan of the show and pretty much stopped watching after the first movie was released. Personally, I didn't much care one way or the other. Like I said, taken as an episode of the TV show, it was okay. For her, seeing as it's one of her favorite shows of all time, I think it was a massive disappointment. So very little for a fan that's been so very loyal and that's a fucking shame.


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